Measuring Success (Again)

About a year ago I put up a post about how we might measure success.

I quoted author Sonya Hartnett who said:

“I would never be great at what I did. I would never have [commercial] success…I’m good but I am not great. All these things I have just become resigned to. It’s better to be all right than to be crappy. Better to have moderate [commercial] success than have no [literary] success”

A couple of weeks ago I borrowed The Ghosts’ Child from our local library for my daughter. Very soon, I found myself thumbing through it … and I couldn’t put the novel down. Here is a children’s book with great depth and feeling. It’s about an elderly lady looking back at her life, seeing life as a mountain which she climbs and then gazing back at her journey. Very philosophical. Very wise stuff for a kid’s book.

A couple of days ago, I found out that the author had won the Astrid Lindgren Memorial Award, the world’s biggest prize for children’s and youth literature. The award is funded by the Swedish Government. The prize money is worth RM2.4 million!

Well, I think Sonya Hartnett has not only achieved commercial success but also literary success. We can measure success in a lot of ways. How you feel about your own writing, your own internal accomplishments, I believe is the most vital. But winning the prize is a pretty spectacular achievement.

A Small Business (Experiment)

A few years back, I bought Frankenstein, Dracula and Jekyll and Hyde on cassette. This gave me the idea of perhaps publishing some of my own stories as an Audiobook. I would put them on CDs and try to persuade our local bookshops to stock them. I even discussed it with my good friend, Chacko, the famous actor. His deep voice would bring the stories to life. We even talked money. But nothing much came out of it.

Fortunately, technology has since moved on. Instead of publishing the books on CD, I could just put them on the web. So the bookshop as middle man is removed. Listeners can then buy any stories they wanted, instead of having to buy it all. They’d get it straight away and be able to transfer it to their MP3 players of iPods. This would also be a way of reaching out to those who don’t read.

My computer comes with Garageband. So instead of getting an actor to read the stories, I’d could do them myself, right here, right now. I’m no great reader, but reading them myself would keep costs down. In that way I’d be able to charge perhaps only a couple of Ringgit per story. With the idea in mind, I experimented and although I did cringe a bit at the sound of my voice, it didn’t sound too awful.

The most difficult part, I reckon, would be setting up the delivery and payment mechanism on the web. Perhaps Paypal can help out here but they charge at least RM1 per transaction. If I persist and have a bit of luck, I might be able to set it up myself. I can at least give it a go.

Yet I do have some doubts. Would anyone out there be interested? A lot of people on the web are looking for freebies and having to whip out their credit card is another story. Then, this morning, just as I was about to write this post, I read Yang-May Ooi’s blog and found her posts on Audiobooks … now that’s synchronicity! So perhaps I should cast away my doubts. Yang-May discusses all the benefits of Audiobooks. Listening to them whilst gardening though is something I’ve yet to try.

If I’m lucky, it might become a small business for me. It would be an experiment, to see if it works. It’d be fun too, I think. But I’m still not a hundred percent sure …

What do you good folk think?

My ZX81

I’ll admit that in today’s world I’m a newbie when it comes to many things in the labyrinthine world of computers. The technology just shot away from me whilst I was busy doing other stuff like negotiating legal contracts and, later, just plain old writing books.

As a teenager, computers took a fair chuck of my time. I wrote short programs in BASIC for the PET computers in our computer lab at school. Yes, there were such things as computer labs rather than a machine in every bedroom! Most of the time I was either trying to program games or playing chess with the machine.

Then I bought my first computer: a ZX81 for 99 pounds. I loaded the software with a cassette player and our home TV was the monitor. It was in black and white. It took many minutes to load an application. Often the program failed to load.

The ZX81

Owning such a machine meant hours copying lines and lines of computer code from ZX81 magazines into the computer and then saving it. I saved it on a cassette as there was no hard disk. Then, if I had copied the code correctly, (which means not even missing out a single comma) I’d end up with a rudimentary game.

I later programmed my own sort of adventure game. Surprise, surprise … it was called Dracula!

The ZX81 had no keyboard but a keypad. So I bought a proper keyboard, unscrewed open the computer and soldered the two together. There was no such thing as plug and play in those days.

It was also around this time that IBM brought out its new machine called a Personal Computer with an operating system called DOS from Microsoft. These new PCs were then incredibly expensive.

A couple of years later, for about 150 pounds, I bought the new model: the ZX Spectrum. Same concept except for the better keyboard and colour. I was now at university and had no time for programming. Instead we played computer games.

The ZX Spectrum

During the holidays in KL, I worked part time work for the Sinclair distributor in Imbi Plaza. It was good fun being a sales assistant selling Sinclair computers. But sales didn’t take off because the machines were too expensive due to the high exchange rate.

After finishing university and Bar exams, I bought the even newer model called the Sinclair QL. This machine actually had a proper keyboard and, instead of a cassette, a micro disk drive. That drive wasn’t so reliable and so the machine was never a success. All I did on that machine was write my Masters dissertation. Other than word processing, the machine also had a spreadsheet. It was the sign of times to come.

The Sinclair QL

Incidentally, the Sinclair company decided to build electric cars as well as computers. Together with the poor sales of the QL and the folly of the electric car, the company went under. Clive Sinclair, the CEO, was ahead of his time. In this dangerous era of climate change, we should all be driving his electric car.

The Sinclair C5 electric car

I was now back in Malaysia and using PCs. For me, for many years computers were just for writing. And, of course, the occasional computer game.

Then came email. Then the web. Then blogging. Then social networking.

Today, I also use my iMac for page layout, photoshopping and illustrating.

I wish I still had my first computer. I doubt it would still work. But I’d hold it and just recall a simpler time when computers were for hobbyists and people talked to each other instead of staring at screens.

How I’d caress that ZX81.

(Hey, maybe I could get one on eBay?)

What item do you wish you still possessed?

A Country Cottage

Every week or so, I drive for about an hour or so to our small country cottage. It’s in a town founded in the early 1800s. There’s a large church and many small cottages made from wood or stone and many of them recognised by the National Trust.

It’s a peaceful place set in a valley, surrounded by farms. Other than the rattle of the agricultural machinery and visits by leather clad bikers, who enjoy wending their way through the empty country roads, visiting the place is like stepping back in time.

Our cottage is old too. More than 150 years have slipped by its timber structure. On my solo visits, I bring my lap top and write on the dining table. I cook a simple meal in the small kitchen that looks out to the garden. It could be two minute noodles or a can of soup and bread. In the evenings, I usually light a fire in the wood heater. It’s quite romantic, even when you’re alone. I hear its simmer and crackling. I see the flames eagerly licking the charred firewood.

The dining room and wood heater

As I write, I hear farm dogs barking, the sheep calling out soft and low, a truck driving past, even a cow mooing, and then it goes quiet. That’s what I need to write at my best. Quietude. Solitude.

My best writing gets done here.

Better still, that’s when I forget I’m writing.

The garden and studio

I have my cup of tea. There are birds chirping. The neighbour’s apple tree overhangs our fence. I pick one as I wander through the garden. There’s depth here, of other lives, other memories. This is not a place you own. Not really. The garden is lovely, even though it’s overgrown and dry.

There’s even a writer’s studio awaiting. I haven’t used it yet. But I hope to.

Where do you do your best writing?

Ouch! Ouch!! Ouch!!!

On Saturday, I carried our very heavy futon up the stairs to my son’s bedroom. My 7-year-old son was having a friend sleep over. On Sunday, after the friend left (and they had lots of fun, going to the beach, playing video games, soccer etc), I hauled the futon back downstairs. No problem.

On Monday, my back started to play up. On Tuesday, whilst doing my morning Yoga, I felt something give in my lower back. On Wednesday, I was in agony.

I’ve been doing the exercises my physiotherapist showed me the last time I hurt my back. I think it helps a bit and helps strengthen the core muscles again. I’ve put on a heat pad which is great but now I can’t find them in the pharmacy. I’ve ordered some on the internet and it’s sure to arrive when I don’t need them anymore. I’m using Voltaran balm combined with a Thai balm which I rub on my back. There’s some relief there as I feel the heat penetrate. I’m also wearing a corset. It helps support the back and keeps it warm too. Winter has suddenly arrived here and I wonder if that’s a contributing factor.

Although I’ve been taking a pain killer, sleep hasn’t been easy as I toss and turn in the early hours of morning. Each turn is accompanied by some discomfort. I continually move around in bed to find a more comfortable position. I hardly sit down during the day as sitting down isn’t so good for this old back of mine. I’m writing this standing up. That’s pretty ok but my feet get a bit sore and there’s a growing pain in one knee. I feel like an old man!

My apologies for all these complaints. All other problems and issues become secondary when there’s a health problem, doesn’t it? Mine are very minor compared to so many other, but still it’s literally a pain!

I think, in future, I need to be very careful with the weight I carry. No matter how macho I’m feeling. Once you’ve had a back injury you become prone to more such injuries. The back is just not as strong as before.

So enjoy and appreciate your health. I certainly do now!